Life and Dreams

What is the truth about making your dreams come true? Dave has struggled much of his adult life feeling like he is not in a position to pursue his dreams. I have argued with him that if he thinks about his dream differently, he could start the process that moves him closer to his dream life. Through a series of unfortunate events I find myself wondering if maybe he's right, maybe if you make one choice in life, the door closes on the other (your dream).

The optimist in me says, No! I can live this life with my family and live my dream, too. Circumstances dictate something else. I then go to optimistic thought number two, What if I seek a slightly different version of my dream? Maybe, but can you feel like your dream is truly being fulfilled if it's not really your dream? I would argue yes, but one would have to want to make the change. Or maybe a better way to say that is one would have to love the life they are living more than they love the idea of their original dream coming to fruition - and fully recognize that.

“There are two ways of being happy: We must either diminish our wants or augment our means - either may do - the result is the same and it is for each man to decide for himself and to do that which happens to be easier.” - Benjamin Franklin

I completely believe that changing the way we see our dreams is not only possible but a wonderful option! Life offers such a bounty of possibilities that to limit ourselves to just a few would be a shame. For each of us to truly indulge in the unlimited possibilities available to us, we will have to pick and choose - after all, there are just 24 hours in one day. Be creative in your choosing and be open to ideas that may not be exactly your first choice. You might be pleasantly surprised!

Hope Feels Good.

I don't know if the good news from Wednesday is going to turn the tides, but having the hope that it may is worth the outcome. And if nothing comes of it, it is fun thinking about "what if" it does? I have to live and feel what is appropriate this very minute and right now, EVERYTHING IS POSSIBLE!! Happy Friday and never lose sight of something to hope for.

Friday Is Reason Enough To Be Happy

Don't you agree? It doesn't matter if you work a regular Monday through Friday job or some other combination of days, everyone seems to agree that Fridays have a special appeal. I know there is no other day that I wake up feeling like I do on Fridays. What do you think, is Friday reason enough to be happy?

How Do You Motivate Somebody?

The truth is, you can only motivate someone who wants to be motivated. I'm told on a daily basis that I make a difference in people's lives, and that I inspire people to take action. I love that! I now know that my mission in life to use my ability to communicate and my bright outlook on life to motivate people to make their lives better.

I've met people who simply love to be in my company, but have no desire to do a single thing different in their lives. One person in particular stands out in my memory. A woman called me with a really serious issue. I listened to her tale, felt like I was being sympathetic, and gently offered up a solution. She didn't like that, she had three problems with my one solution. we talked a little more and again, I offered up an idea. No, not that one either. This went on for more than a 1/2 hour. At one point I asked her if what she wanted was for me to just listen or did she want help solving this problem. She assured me that she definitely wanted an answer, and that she appreciated my willingness to help. We went like this a little longer, I'd offer a solution and she would offer 3-5 problems with my solution. She didn't want to resolve this issue at all, she just wanted to spend time being cared for by me. She was caring for her "baby" (I call these problems with no solutions someones baby. They just want to keep it and care for it.) and wanted me to care for her.

It took me a long time to recognize that what makes some people happy is being unhappy. That's a choice but it's not my choice. Unfortunately, people like this don't make good company for those of us taking action, making things happen, and living a happy life. In fact, in my experience, these kinds of people draw from my energy source limiting my ability to motivate those of you who really want to be lifted up and cheered on. In the end, you can't move someone forward who is happy right where they are. My suggestion is to move on and continue to be happy where you are and where you're going, because I know you are on your way to somewhere really wonderful!

Laughter.

When was the last time you laughed? I mean really laughed. The last time I really laughed was last night when Julianne and I were tweeting (yes, I twitter! @Kdpartak), and she told me a story about her family. I could share the story with you but frankly, you won't find it a stitch humorous. Never mind that, my point is that laughter feels so good! Why do we laugh less as we get older? I don't laugh as often as I might like to.

I see Mason laughing everyday. He will have conversations with pretend people and laugh out loud. He plays all the parts as he sees fit and laughs for everyone! He will make up jokes that have nothing to them, they make absolutely no sense, but he will finish with a big belly laugh. I'm thankful for Mason's joy, because he laughs so often, so do I. I don't find his jokes funny at all, but his happiness is contagious.

Find something today to laugh about. Make up a joke and then laugh. It will sound so canned and fake, that in and of itself will make you laugh for real. Try it and let me know!

Compliments

Do you have a difficult time accepting a compliment? Most people do. As I've gotten a little older, I'm better at graciously accepting the praise of others for one reason; I know how good it feels when I give it.

I realized that when I discount someone who genuinely wants me to know they like or appreciate something about me, I'm in essence telling them I don't think what they have to say is real or valuable. My insecurity, or that little voice that says, "Oh, no. My hair is a mess" is just that, MY insecurity. It has nothing at all to do with the kindness of the other person and may not be based in truth at all.

Next time someone pays you a compliment, pay them one right back and simply say, "Thank you." You will feel good, they will feel good, and this world will be a better place! Smiling!

A Letter To My Husband

Dear Dave,

Have I told you lately how happy you make me? You do. I count my blessings every single day that you love me. I've known for many years that you are an exceptional man, but there are still things you do that surprise me.

You bought me a new outfit to go out for your birthday. I love that you picked out clothes that you thought would make me feel pretty. They did.

You embrace being a dad and when I notice your patience is running short, I can say a simple sentence and you let go a smile. It's so clear that you love your family. Your love of family starts with your parents, especially your mom. You make time to see her, spending time and calling her just to talk.

You volunteer your time in our community and practice random acts of kindness on a regular basis. Whether it's helping someone push their stalled car out of an intersection or searching for a dog on a leash without it's person, you take the time to do the right thing.

There are so many things I can write on and on about. The consideration you express for your coworkers when in social situations, the way you think to arrange play dates for Mason, how you stop along the side of the road to cut wild sweet peas for me, and one of my favorites, the way other people see you look at me. I've been told on numerous occasions that people can see how much you love me.

Today, I want to say that I love you, too. More than I love you, I respect you. It sounds so cliche to say, "I married my best friend." But sometimes, cliche is simply the truth.

With all my love,
Kathy

America Is Alive And Well - By Guest Writer Jay Kliewer

America is alive and well. I was awakened last night from a late nap, approximately 8:00 PM, by a helicopter flying overhead in a large circular pattern and repeatedly saying something. After six passes and with the help of my roommate, I finally made out the message, “There is a 3 year old child missing wearing a green shirt with red and white stripes. He is wearing a diaper and his name is Daniel.”

What I saw as I came out to the front yard and as I walked down my road was the most incredible thing. People had come out of their houses and were walking, running, driving, and I even saw one guy on roller skates looking for Daniel. Moms with young kids, families, teenagers, and single people were all looking for Daniel.

So why were we out there? Honestly . . . I was out there because if I could help those parents look for Daniel then that is what I wanted to do. I know that if that had been a three year old Jhasamin or Jeremiah, I would want other people looking for them. I also think I wanted to partake in something larger. Be a part of something bigger than myself. I didn’t want to sit home when I was needed and there was something I could give. Maybe in a strange way I also wanted to be seen, as if to say, "Look at me, I am helping too."

By 8:40 pm just as abruptly as it started the helicopter made two big circles and said, “Thank you for your help. The child has been found.”

Recently I had an opportunity to take a four man delegation of Nigerian FEMA leaders around to various organizations in the Sacramento and San Francisco areas to show them how Californians respond to disasters. They said their overall problem in Nigeria with regards to disasters is APATHY. What an awesome thought to know that America is not a Country of Apathy. And just like our fore fathers, those many years ago, whom were willing to make a difference with their fellow man to fight for independence, that same spirit still flows through our veins today as we came together to look for a child that no one knew. Daniel’s parents will never know that a 40 year old man got up from his nap and spent a half hour looking for their child.

As Vincent, one of the Nigerian delegates was being dropped off at the San Francisco Airport he told me that people in Nigeria were praying for America. Well Vincent your prayers are being heard and thank you.

God has Blessed the USA with the men, women, and children who live here!

Happily Married

As you all know by now, Dave and I are very happily married. I know several other couples that are also very happy and they express their affection openly and abundantly. I asked Dave if he thought we were happy because we tell each other how we feel, and generally focus on being so.

We agreed that being happy is a choice. There are certainly things about each other that are mildly annoying, but it just seems that those things come along with a really great package, thus making them insignificant.

Here again, is evidence that those things you choose to focus on, grow. We focus on the things about each other that we first loved, learned about later and loved, and still have to find out about and expect to love. What about you? What do you choose to focus on in your marriage? I wish for you love and happiness!

Don't Forget Dad!

Mom Central has their annual Father's Day Gift Guide out and wait until you see what they have! Great gifts under $25, $50, and over $100. There is something here for every budget!

What's especially cool is that you can click on each link and you are right there, shopping in the "Dad" section of the store! All the great things that guys like, are in one place and in your price range. Check it out and get dad something he's gonna really love!

Go to: http://www.momcentral.com/giftguide/fathersday/ Everything you need is right at your fingertips!


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Isn't Time The Best?

Last week was a roller coaster of emotions. I won't bore you with the details, but suffice it to say, I was exhausted by the time the weekend rolled around.

I take comfort knowing that a little bit of time will set my thinking right, take me out of my emotion filled angst, and let me get back to my faith that, everything is as it is suppose to be. I really do believe that, and I've come to be able to recognize what it is I need to learn from a difficult experience in a relatively short period of time. I also trust that as tough as things may get, in the big picture (long time), much of our day-to-day lives is not going to hold much weight in five years.

I won't go as far as to say that I believe time heals all wounds, but it sure provides a nice cushion from the pain, and reminds us that a new day is just that, new. Let go of the old and create today. You get to choose your thoughts, and your thoughts create your actions. Go, choose wisely and make today great!

Yesterday Was Really Bad!

Laughing! Maybe I shouldn't have posted about being grateful when life gets tough! Did I attract that? I'm laughing because I finished crying and can now see that it really wasn't all that bad.

I can honestly say that even though I was in the troughs of despair....little melodrama...I was still able to be grateful that it wasn't worse. And even better, I was able to check with a friend who is battling cancer and if that doesn't put a crummy day in perspective, nothing will.

I am so very grateful for all that I have. I even went as far as to putting an e-mail out to my work associates offering my consulting services at a discounted rate to their clients. I really want to help in these tough times, so why not let the world know. This is just another way that I practice gratitude. How do you show your gratitude and put it into action when times get tough?

Can You Be Grateful When Life Is Really Bad?

Times are really tough right now for many of us. I know my family is not exempt from tight finances, things breaking, and difficult life circumstances in general. No matter what happens, I've found a solid space of gratitude.

Yesterday, while cleaning my very old stove top, it blew up. Literally! Fiery sparks, a puff of white smoke, and a pop! I don't have the money to replace it, but I won't take the chance that this is a fire waiting to happen. As soon as this happened, I found myself uttering, "Thank goodness it didn't catch on fire."

Can you practice gratitude when you are at your lowest? I hope so. The reality is, no matter how bad things get, they can always get worse. I learned a long time ago to never, ever challenge the universe with the words, "It can't get worse than this." I believe as long as I'm dressed in my right mind, no matter what circumstances present themselves, I can do something to better my condition. I usually start with acknowledging and accepting where I am. I try to learn if the lesson is obvious and then I look at what I can do, and I start.

That's my way. What's yours? Can you be grateful when life gets really bad?

Do You Dread Monday?

Are you one of those people who hates to see the new week begin? Not me! I love Monday! Not only do I love the opportunities that come with the new work week, but I love the structure of the weekdays.

Even though I don't go into an office, all the people I work with are doing exactly what I'm doing. We may not be in the same room, building, or even the same state, we're all working together; connecting via e-mail and telephone. Mason is in school and Dave is at his office. We all know where we need to be and what we need to be doing, and it feels good.

If you really really feel a deep disdain for the start of a new work week, maybe you need to ask yourself what you could be doing that you would look forward to. Dave doesn't love his work, but he loves his family, and the job he does provides for us. I look forward to the new week because what I'm doing is moving us one step closer to our dreams of working together in all of our philanthropic goals.

Yes, the new week takes the vehicle out of park and gets us back on the road to success. If you'd rather sit in the parking lot, than think about what you're attracting with a heavy sigh and dread of Monday. Is it what you really want your new week to shape up to be? Whatever you think, you're right!

What Is Your Intention For This Day?

Do you ever think like that? Do you actually intend for your day to be something specific? I do.

It's like your "to do" list only it's specifically about the energy of your day. I'm a list person. I might think it's because I'm getting older and my memory is not as sharp as it used to be, but I've always been a list maker. If I put it on my list, it likely gets done in a timely fashion. I can go about the tasks in my day not having to worry about forgetting anything. As I finish one, I go cross it off my list and start the next task.

I do this as I start each day in terms of, "what are my intentions for today?" I can review my list from yesterday and see what needs to happen, and I take a peek at my calendar and see where I need to be, and from there, I have a pretty good feel of what my intentions are for this special day.

Today I have a long list of things I need to do. I've already finished several of them.

My intention for today is to serve enough people with what I know that will help them, and in turn, see that energy flow back to me in terms of freelance writing work and Virtual Assistant projects.

In essence, you could say I'm listening to the wonderful Zig Ziglar, "You can have anything you want as long as you help enough other people get what they want." I love it.

Now, how can I help you?