Before I get into this, let me preface that I wrote this last year when something happened and it felt, at that moment like the worst thing ever! I wrote this to post on social media and then did not hit "post." I did think enough of what I wanted to share to copy it and save it for a later, today is that time.
At what point in our lives do we recognize that there are good days and not such good days in our lives? Of course, we know that logically, but there are times when shit happens and we can't get out of the mindset that it is "THE WORST" thing that could happen.
When life beats me up, I try really hard to allow myself to feel whatever is appropriate at the moment, but ultimately to try to move out of the really bad feelings, I remind myself that Mason is alive and well, Dave and I are being granted the privilege to grow older, and everything else is the stuff that we have to do our best to deal with and get through.
Look at really old people and how they stay calm and encourage us to enjoy the people around us, work in our gardens, paint the picture, bake the cake and then eat some, and just know it will be okay. It may not be the same, but it will be okay. My granny is in my ear today, "Kahty, (that's how she said my name) this too shall pass. Here, let's have some tea and toast." And she would make me tea and sing a little song while she did it.
And before I get beat up for not fully understanding how bad it really is, I am writing this for me, to process my feelings, not about anybody else. I still feel bad about the way things go sometimes but I just can't stay in the, "how bad this is." Ask my husband and son, I prefer to look for the rainbows and butterflies that seem to surround me wearing my rose-colored glasses. I'm okay, just working through life stuff, I will do what I can to repair and or rectify the situation and then I have to release it.